LR 050710 - Same Night Sex, Speed Dating and Text Game

LR 050710 - SNL Speed Dating and Text

Last Friday night I went to a Speed Dating Event at the last minute with Xenakis. In my experience the best opportunities happen before and after the Speed Dating rather than during the 4 minute speed dates themselves. Another key is to get a woman’s phone number on the spot after the event if you were interested in her rather than wait for the match-making people to notify you.

Even though there were more men than women at the event we had a major factor working in our favor: the women were going to rotate while the men would stand in the same place. Earlier in the day I had read that when women were assigned to the traditionally male role of approaching potential romantic partners, they were not any pickier than men in choosing that special someone to date, according to the speed dating study.A key factor in how attracted a man or woman is who is perceived to be the pursuer, which we know has always been a key concept. 

Another challenge to myself was to avoid the "what do you do" and "where are you from" questions by leading with something spontaneous and offbeat from the beginning of each conversation. While the Speed Dating rotation itself had some fun points, I waited for the open bar after party to really make any moves. I caught the eye of a tall brunette (HB Speed Date Brunette) about 5’10, bigger boobs than I thought at first. I started talking to her at an angle and made sure that I always maintained a slight angle so I could get closer to her without being directly face to face. Tired to the small talk from earlier, I went into my normal mode of interacting with women shock and escalate. She asked my name and then I looked at her name tag, making a deliberate point to stare at it a little. After saying her name I paused, “hmm, 36D?” “Guess again” she said” “DD” I replied. She nodded. I said “wow that’s pretty cool you shouldn’t try to hide them away like that.” “There's some free advice for you that I give all of my friends with big beautiful breasts.” We walked over to the open bar to get refills, she had whiskey and coke, I complimented her on that. Ah, a woman that likes whiskey, 5 chick coolness points for you. After some by the bar, she then introduced me to two of her friends, two guys and one girl. I briefly acknowledged each one and spoke to one of them, then jumped back into talking to her while her other friends talked amongst themselves about 10 feet away.

I then transitioned the conversation as we walked over to the couches and sat down. “My friend is going to get food and I’m starving too, but mind if we sit down for a moment. You know it would be much more interesting if people asked, what is one of the craziest sexual adventures you have ever had? Then again then it would have to be Dark Odyssey Speed Dating rather than this event." She asked what is Dark Odyssey? So then I went into my description of the event, yeah there were these classes and it was like a kinky gym where people could rotate from one station to another. My then girlfriend and I went to the place where people were just fucking and did it on a swing right in front of a small crowd. It was awesome (see HB Redhead story for more about that.) She had a little shamrock tattoo on her thigh, the first time I saw that I said oh, I guess this means I’m getting lucky. HB Speed Date laughed. Then I asked her “I don’t suppose you have a tattoo?” It turns out she had two, one on each thigh. “So what’s your freaky story?” She replied, “I’ve had a threesome before. Although it was with a guy friend of mine and his girlfriend, it made things kind of awkward after that, but it was fun.”

Then we were out in Vegas at this event called the Masterful Lover SuperConference and we won a remote control vibrating egg for audience participation. As a field trip we went to a strip club with a remote control vibrating egg in her. I kept flipping it on and off while she had a lap dance with two strippers. It was hot and they kept asking if they could take her home. Then I jumped to the fact that the ex had tattoos and how every woman I had met that had tattoos had a freaky side to her. HB Speed Date Brunette then replied that she had tattoos. I asked her where and she said one on each upper thigh.

She said, "so what happened with the girl?" I said, "she moved away to travel the country as a model. It never would have worked out she was a vegetarian. I’ve concluded that there is something wrong with women that are vegetarians." She agreed. "Yeah, I’ll take a nice juicy steak any day." I then number closed for the time being because I wanted to get a few more phone numbers from some of the women I had spoken with earlier. “I want to say good bye to a few people and then I’m grabbing some food with my friend, but I’ll be around later, I’ll drop you a text once I know where we are at and perhaps we can meet up.” The rest was almost entirely text message.

I have been testing a new philosophy when it comes to text messages and that is that text messages can be used as a way to just continue the conversation and continue the momentum that is already there. This can be a good way to either meet up that same night or to increase the odds that she will answer your call or return a voice message. A few key points on the text message exchange below. Notice my use of weasel phrases, anchors and some humor and how giving my location was enough to get her to give her location. Also notice the sexual escalation, with each favorable reply, I escalate. The key to making this work was that I established the sexual frame early on in the conversation and got her active participation. I also started building compliance from the beginning, we had three mini-bounces, standing spot to bar, to couch. Then the sensual and sexual escalation was the same escalate – compliance – more escalation.


Text Messages
Me: Grabbing food, catch up to you a little later.
Her: Ok, have fun!
Me: Debating going back to the bar
Her: We just left, at the metro
Her: Now in DuPont getting food
Me: We might go to Public at some point
Her: ? I don’t know dc lol
Me: You need a tour guide Miss Tourist
Her: Lol yeah prob .. I stick to va
Me: Yeah? Land of the brown flip flops
Her: Flip flops would be heaven right now!
Me: Oh yeah, that and a foot massage where you can just feel every ounce of tension easing out of your body
Her: Yeah that would be really great to, after the walking I just did
Me: Mmm, a relaxing massage followed by a skillful tongue tracing it’s way along your thighs
Her: That might make me shake
Me: Mmm, as you shake you can already being to anticipate the warmth spreading on down …
Her: Yea cuz it’s def been a while
Me: Awhile eh, I don’t know if you can imagine the feel of a nice thick cock sliding deep inside
(25 minute gap)
Her: Well it better be long too
Me: Long and strong, gotta keep the friction on … Now at Lucky Bar
Her: Back in Bethesda takin my friend home
Me: Care for some company to distress and have some good old fashioned fun?
Her: I don’t have my own place sadly and my feet r really hurtin
Her: Otherwise I might be tempted
Me: Too bad we can’t, I’m out in Alexandria, but you’re now in Bethesda?
Her: Headed to McLean
Me: Driving? Stop by my place.
Her: Should I trust you enough to come over?
Me: I’m as trust worthy as the Big Bad Wolf, I might just have to eat you
Her: Where do you live?
Me: I gave her my address
Her: Can I ask how many people you have been with?
Me: A few
Her: That’s very vague lol
Me: Enough to learn how such clit and hit just the right spots …
Her: Safely I hope
Me: Of course
Her: Let me plug it into my GPS, I’m a mile from my house
Her: I would normally say no, but I’m trusting u
Me: I appreciate it and it will be worth your while
Her: I’ll be there in 20 min
(I left the bar and got home minutes before she arrived)

She came over and those were some very nice breasts and she was good company too. Handwriting analysis revealed no major hell traits After having some good fun talk and more fun, when I walked her out I said we should do this again sometime I’ll be in touch with you soon. She smiled and said sounds good. The next day I sent her a text message "Still smiling from last night see you around sometime soon." Her reply thanks Since then we have exchanged x rated text pictures, good times!

LR 9/28/08 - HB Redhead who turned into LTR

LR 9/28/08 - HB Redhead who turned into LTR

By popular request I am finally posting this field report from September 2008 which ended up turning into an LTR for 6 months and led to me being mostly MIA from the field and the metroDCPUA forum while I was seeing her. Here is the story

I started out the day at Fearless apartment where he and Dare had been putting on a workshop for a few members of the underground. I came in a little late and did a demo for some NLP style language patterns for comfort building and sexual escalation. I hung out with a group a Chi Cha Lounge for most of the night, props to Dare for handing the staff who tried to move us into a shitty table – we ended up with 2 tables and a free hookah after he spoke with the owner. I got about 4-5 phone numbers and generally had fun but nothing was really clicking at the level I would like. By about 2 am Chi Cha was closing down and only Fearless and I were left. We left and I considered going home because in my by that time of the night most women that are going to hook up are either gone or pretty much locked in by another guy. I’m usually taking women home by 12:30 – 1:00, sometimes sooner.

I didn’t feel like going home so I ended up going to Brass Monkey alone instead. I’ve always preferred more dive-like places where the drinks are cheaper and the atmosphere is more casual. I was in a great laid-back frame of mind, calm with no expectations, mostly sober.

As I walked in I locked eye contact with a decently cute girl with her friend that was walking out. I kept eye contact and she kept looking as she walked to the door and then stopped and turned and stared at me. She started walking back toward me while towing her friend and within a moment we were standing face to face and I just leaned in and starting making out with her. That lasted a few minutes but I was only slightly interested in her and her friend was ready to pull her away within a few minutes. I just laughed a little as her friend dragged her out the door and I turned to make a sweep through the bar.

My focus was to look for lingering eye contact that indicated a high amount of initial attraction based on appearance and how I was carrying myself. Then if I got that from a girl I was interested in I was going to mirror her facial expressions, assume rapport with a high value open as if we already know each other.

I didn’t see anything interesting on the first floor, so I went up to the second floor. As soon as I got to the top of the stairs on the 2nd floor I noticed immediately noticed a cluster of women wearing brightly colored outfits, including a curvy blonde and a tall redhead. What the hell was this? I noticed the blonde first but then there was something about the redhead. She had a tall statuesque figure and wore a bright pink dress with bright yellow tights and equally bright yellow beads around her neck. Her hair was a reddish auburn color with big frizzy curls like 80s hair and she wore black lacy gloves on her hands. The outfit wasn’t really quite flattering but it was obvious to me that she was pretty cute and I felt a very strong sexual vibe. Clearly this woman was fun with an ironic sense of humor.

I locked eye contact with HB redhead, mirroring her facial expression and squinting my eyes a little with an evil smile. An almost predatory voice inside my head said “mmm, she’s mine,” and I felt a calm yet excited feeling of certainty and inevitability. Since our eyes had already said hello, I moved in close and casually said “hi” as if we already knew each other while touching her arm. She returned the favor with an almost ironically throaty “hello” seductively tilting her head down while gazing up at me. I slightly mirrored what she did and we started talking. Game on!

As we spoke I made sure to maintain good posture and keep my body, especially my shoulders and face, relaxed. I could feel tension continuing to build, all sub communication. She said I looked like a hotter version of Conan O’Brian :) Since I had rapport I used the eye contact to communicate my own state as I ramped it up, first to pace her reality and then to lead it higher. A powerful sensuality pored from her, and I knew that I was dealing with an extremely sexual woman. So I knew I could really pore on the sexual escalation without restraint.

She noticed the Bacardi blinking button, which worked like a charm once again to spark some conversation. She had been a promotional model too and was here with her friends on a going away party, since she was leaving in about 2 weeks. That’s why they were all dressed up in 80s clothes for what she called “80s prom night.” She had already moved out of her apartment and had been staying with a friend in Adams Morgan. Ah, this would be too perfect!

Within a few moments of talk I leaned in to kiss her. Her body buckled and as she powerfully responded I kept amping up the aggression. After less than 30 seconds of kissing lips and mouth I moved to her neck biting and nibbling my way to the back of her neck, taking care to hit one erogenous zone after the other. I grabbed her hair, pulling it just hard enough to send a tinge of electric sensations shooting through her body and make her head move and then maintained it at that level, intense but not quite painful. I firmly grabbed onto her waist pulling her up against my leg so that it was firmly pressing against her pussy, while she grabbed onto my neck and arm for balance.

As we began to get even more turned on I roughly pushed her back against the brick wall, taking care to put my hand behind her head so it didn’t slam into the wall. We continued to make out and I kissed her nipples right through her dress. A flash went off as one of her friends took a picture with her camera of the spectacle that was unfolding right in the middle of the bar. I fed off her sexual energy, feeding it back to amplify it as my own state kept going. I was grinding hard against her tight pussy to a sexual rhythm, basically dry humping against the wall. I knew she was mine to take as I crushed her up against the wall. He eyes had this hazy defocused look on them, she was totally gone, as if entranced by the experience (and a little intoxicated too).

I pulled back for a moment, to tease, to fractionate and allow things to cool slightly so that I could come back a moment later and bring things even higher. I tried to think of what to do next, talk a little, make out some more? I realized that there really wasn’t anything left for me to do. I had an evil grin on my face. “No, please, you’re just a tease,” she said. I responded “Oh yeah, is that what you think?” I looked straight into her eyes roughly crushed her up against the wall again, firmly kissing her mouth, pulling her hair harder this time and grinding into her pussy as all of those feelings instantly ramped up even higher than they had been moments before. At this point I realized this was and had been a done deal, and I thought that I could probably say anything and she would come with me.

I pulled back and said in a very low key casual voice, I’m hungry, let’s grab a slice of pizza, head back to my place and I’ll cook you breakfast in the morning, salmon and goat cheese omelet. She paused for just a moment, while it sunk in that this was my move to get her home with me. Ok, um you want to go now? Yes, now. Ok, let me get my purse and my camera back from my friend and we’ll go. After a very brief exchange with her friend the lights started coming on upstairs and we left. We passed Caveman and Horizon on the way out of Brass Monkey.

As we were walking down 18th ST, there was some brief dialogue
Her: “ok mister I don’t know what you have planned between now and cooking me breakfast in the morning, (smile) but we need to stop by a drug store to pick up some Polyurethane condoms, most guys don’t keep those around.”
Me: “Oh yeah, latex allergy?”
Her: “Let’s just say I very strongly prefer them.
Me: Ok.
Her: Also I need to be able to get back to meet up with my friends by 11:00 tomorrow.
Me: Ok, no problem.

With that we walked down the hill, got some pizza and then got in the car to head back to my place in Virginia.

At some point she asked me what I do and I said "various things although I’m looking to teach guys how to get laid." I said I believe there is a way to teach men how to be strong and very sexual while not being an asshole. I explained my philosophy about how people were way too judgmental and that society in too harshly judgmental of women and sex. I said I don’t judge people based on their sexual behavior, it’s just part of who they are. Around that time some random guy called for the first of several times. Her ring tone was set to Metallica’s Sandman for any guy callers. She hit ignore. We stopped by CVS just down the street from my house and I had a huge shit eating grin on my face as I passed a box of condoms to the check out clerk.

We went back to my place to eat the pizza slices we picked up in Adams Morgan. In the kitchen I pinned her against the stove and made out with her while the pizza was reheating in the microwave. When it was time to take them out I pulled back and said, ah time for food. “You tease, she said with a playful twinkle.” We ate and then went into my bedroom where I threw her down on the bed and we went at it. She was a complete animal, I’ve never seen a woman that powerfully sexual before. The poor chump kept calling and calling, so in the middle of fucking her I kept hearing the Sandman ring tone.

After round 1 of the best sex I think I had ever had up to this point in my life, where she came very powerfully, she explained the phone ringing by saying that she had given her number out to some other guy earlier in the night. You’d think he’d get the hint if I’m not picking up after like 5 times. I wonder if it really was the same guy or maybe even more than 1, but she was definitely looking to hook up that night. While we were talking naked on my bed she said something which would turn out to be really profound. After all of this, can we be friends? Sure, I said as long as we can keep fucking like this. Oh yeah, of course, its just I would not have expected to meet a guy I would want to get to know this way. You’re really smart, and nice in addition to being really hot. Also normally I have to initiate thing in the bar. This is weird, guys aren’t hot and nice and aggressive like this. I shrugged and said “well that’s me, I guess this is your lucky night.”

I asked what she said to her friend in that brief conversation right before we left the bar. She said I told my friend “that this hot guy went totally alpha on me and I would see her tomorrow.” “Normally I have to initiate things, but you just went totally alpha on me and that was all it took.” Nice, I smiled. And then we went at it again. I cooked her breakfast in the morning and got her phone number right before dropping her off at her friend’s place.

Over the next couple months we had many adventures:

She was a pivot a couple times and did a demo with me for a group of guys from the forum
We had sex in the public park across the street from my house
On an overlook on skyline drive, as we enacted one of my erotic stories I had recently sent her
In Vegas while at a conference
At the strip club I repeatedly activated the remote control vibrating egg while she was getting lap dances from strippers
Orgasm from voice commands
I gave her an extended orgasm for over 30 minutes using Sleepnosis, hypnotic induction while she was sleeping
At the Dark Odyssey convention
She gave me head right in the middle of an empty seminar room after we attending a class by porn star Penny Flame called “How to suck cock like a pro” Then we had sex on a swing in front of a crowd in the “sexorama room”


Here are a few text messages that I saved that illustrate how things (rapidly) progressed.
Notice some NLP language constructs like presuppositions, single binds, double binds etc that I used to further amplify the sexual dirty talk.

Wed 10/1
Me: 9:10 PM

Her: “You drive me crazy

Me: 9:31 PM Why thank you my dear, and here is some more text art while I sit here in this seminar 8==> (my text emoticon for balls and penis)

Her: 9:31 PM Haha, what seminar? I read your story and now I feel like a horndog nymphomaniac.

Me: 9:50 PM At this psychology seminar, Mmm its too bad we can’t meet up
tomorrow night …

Her: 10:03 pm You just want to tease me. I’ve got plans for the debates but otherwise …

Me: 11:10 pm… otherwise

Her: 11:23 pm … Fuckfest

Me: Sounds good 11:36 pm


Thurs 10/02
Her: 2:03 PM Got your email. I’ve always really enjoyed stories about bdsm best, followed by group sex and anal. How are we working tonight? Can you pick me up at the metro?


Fri 10/03
Me: 11:08 am Just the thought of you is making my cock really hard

Her: 12:20 pm I would give anything to be lying in your arms with your cock buried deep in my soaking wet pussy.

Me: 1:37 pm The warmth of my firm embrace envelopes you as you feel the fullness of my cock deep inside your tight pussy, and you notice that each ripple of pleasure is heightened

Her: 2:16 pm God I want you so badly! As soon as I see you I’m going to pounce on you. You’re making me absolutely wild!

Her: 4:06 pm Oh man, my work is finished and my contract is up! I am officially free!

Mon 10/06
Me: 5:32 pm 8==>

Her: 5:45 pm Last night I had a vivid dream of your strong arms holding me down while you thrust thick cock in me over and over until I was screaming and writhing under you.

Me: 5:51 pm I suppose we could make that vivid dream a reality tonight …

Her: 5:53 pm Unfortunately I cant, I’m still in Laurel tonight. I’ll have to settle with dreams again tonight. I just cant get you out of my head

Me: 6:09 pm Well then, as you dream tonight imagine what it will be like as my cock is thrusting deep inside your tight wet pussy tomorrow night or Wed until …

(Some more chat during the Vice Presidential debate)

Her: 10:15 And what led you from politics to sexpert … Besides your thick dick?

Me: 10:23 Sex, Seduction, Politics they’re not that different … Bill Clinton was such a pimp!

Her: 10:30 I think the sexiest thing about you is how smart you are.
Maybe I’m too Washington. Its not to knock your body, which I think is way hot


10/07
Me: 1:44 pm Mmm, I’m horny just thinking about you right now.

Her: 2:58 pm I’m thinking of how cut your abs are among other things.
If you parted my pussy lips and slid your fingers in they would be soaked because I want you so badly.

10/10
Her: 8:36 am I hope you weren’t late for work! Have a great day because you’re a great person and you deserve it!

Me: 8:49 am Aw, thank you, and no problem being late. Have fun with your travels and in New York! You’re a truly beautiful person through and through and I love you!

Her: 8:59 am I love you too! What an incredible two weeks this has been. I feel so giddy. You are handsome and smart, too good to be true – but you are!

Me: 12:14 pm aw thank you ditto on the sentiment. I didn’t know the possibility of you existed. But then again I had not yet met you.

11/09
her 5:41 PM 11/09/08: I love you so much! I miss you already.
Thanks for the wonderful weekend! I cant wait to see you again!

me 11/09/08 6:16 pm: I love you too, talk to you soon

11/11
her 10:23 PM: I love you so much! You are a wonderful presence in my life!

me 10:39 pm: Thank you I love you too! Miss you

her 10:41 pm: I miss you too. Youre just such a wonderful influence on me. I feel like im growing when im with you.


11/23
her 8:47 pm: I love you so much! You are the best lay, best cook and best man I’ve ever had the pleasure to meet!
me 9:46 pm: Wow, why thank you! I love you too!
her 10:53 pm: I cant stop thinking of you and smiling. I love you and can’t wait to see you again!

me 11/24 9:53 pm: Btw my abs are sore from the other day
her 11/25 12:26 am: I bet you abs aren’t as sore as my inner thighs.
:-P . I love you tons and I cant wait to fuck you again!

her 12/02 4:40 pm: I just had a vivid dream about bringing a hot chick to you and having a way kinky 3some. Now my pussy is absolutely soaked.